by Alfred Jones/America Sun Apr 17, 2011 11:06 am
Alfred stood there, perfectly still, clutching to the mic stand as though it was his life line. He was shaking terribly and all the colour had drained from his face. People...there was so many PEOPLE! He’d never ever been in front of so many people before. He’d been in a crowd that big of course, he had attended school assemblies whenever they were on but he’d never been out at the front. Like he was now, with so many eyes on him. The entire school was staring at them intently, waiting for them to perform for them and it was so terrifying! God, what on earth had possessed him to join this club in the first place? Ah right, his love of singing and music. Still, he should have known that they would have to perform.
Alfred wanted nothing more right now than to run off the stage and hide himself somewhere quiet and unpopulated. Maybe on the school roof. Anywhere but here would be good. Away from all these students, who he just knew would laugh at him, who would tease him horribly for the rest of his school life. He couldn’t stand that, he just couldn’t. They would all point at him, laugh and call him names, all relating to him being gay. Then he would have no friends...maybe the students would throw rocks at him, his last group of friends, who he’d adored so much had instantly turned on him. The moment they found out he was gay they stopped being his friends and hated him with a fiery passion. The next day they had approached him, cornering the young American outside on the football field, before pelting him with rocks, yelling hurtful words at him and wishes for him to just die, that no one loved or wanted his kind around there. He’d pulled himself out of that school the very next day, enrolling himself here the very next year. He had been 13 when that had happened. He still remembered the look of disgust on their faces the last time they had saw him and the amusement that shone on his own father’s face the night after he had been hurt. The man probably though he deserved it.
Even though every fibre of his being wanted to dash out of this building right now he firmly stayed put, not moving a single inch. It wouldn’t be fair on the club if he left right now; they’d all worked so hard to bring this performance together. So, as to not let them down, he decided to sing. He saw Roddy nod and he nodded back shakily, gripping the mic stand tighter. He could do this. And if he was ridiculed and hated after this, he could always switch schools again. It wasn’t like Alfred had any reason to stay here anyway.